In the throes of a marriage gone bad, making the best out of a sour situation can seem impossible. After years of marriage, divorce can be an uncertain start for many – not only do you have to begin a new life on your own, but you might have to do it with a different set of resources. Is there anyway but the hard way after marriage?
Admittedly, facing off with the emotional stress of divorce is not a match easily won. Coming to terms with the end of marriage and planning for a new situation requires candid conversations and honest advice. It’s okay to start small and ask for help from someone else in an effort to build up to the bigger conversations with your spouse.
Using “the talk” productively
Raising the issue of divorce can seem overly confrontational to many at the start of the process. However, for couples who can find a way to use “the talk” productively, mediation may be an option in divorce. What’s this process like?
You may think of divorce in terms of bitter courtroom battles and fights at home, but it doesn’t have to be this way. In fact, according to Psychology Today, many estranged couples can and do make it through the divorce process with minimal harm to children, familial relationships and career.
Facilitating conversations through meditation
Even if you’ve lost control of your marriage, you may be able to find success in mediation because it allows you to take the reins through divorce. Big picture aspects of parenting and career such as child custody and division of retirement accounts can be discussed openly between you and your spouse. Indeed, many people aren’t worried about the small details of the process. Instead, they just want a good result that leads to long-term success after marriage.
The family law attorney you choose to assist in this process will inform you of the law and coach you through the process. Following the consultation, you and your spouse can begin a productive conversation while your attorney worries about the legal details and mediates the conversation when there’s trouble.
After coming to terms with an agreement, your attorney will review the documents to double check that they are accurate and your wishes are met. From there, the paperwork will be passed onto a judge who will evaluate your agreement based on fairness within the letter of the law.
Couples who are ready to exert peaceful control over their relationship can use mediation productively in divorce.