As a parent, the last thing you want is for your child to suffer as a result of a choice you’ve had to make. When you decide to divorce your spouse, you know that you’ll have to divide your family. How divided it becomes will depend on a number of factors, such as how strong your relationship is with the other parent despite the divorce and if there are conflicts that are still unresolved.
It is your responsibility to help your children through this divorce and to help them stay as healthy and balanced as possible throughout. How can you do so? Here are a few tips.
It’s time for an age-appropriate discussion
The first thing you can do to help your children is to have an age-appropriate discussion about what’s going on and how it may impact them now and in the future. Explain, for example, that you and the other parent are going to live in different homes but that they will still see both of you regularly (if that’s the case for you). Keep the discussion simple, and avoid placing blame or disparaging the other parent during it.
It’s great to get your children involved
Another thing to do is to involve your children in the different parts of the divorce in a positive way. For example, if you and the other parent will move into new homes, it could be helpful to have your children pick out items to take to each home or visit the new home and pick out a bedroom. Doing this gives them back a little bit of control over a situation that is largely not in their control.
It’s smart to stay close to friends and family
If you can, staying close to friends and family that your children have good relationships with is a smart choice. They’ll have more support, and you will, too.
It might be best to get professional help
Finally, think about getting professional support. Children’s therapists, teachers and others can help support your children as they adjust to the new normal.
These are a few ways to help your children get through a divorce. Your approach can help make this a smooth transition.