When You Want To Consider Your Life After Divorce
Rely On My Decades Of Experience As A Peacemaker
At the Law Office of Edward S. Matisoff, I make the most of alternative dispute resolution (ADR). In my over three decades of family law experience, I have assisted many clients through divorce. I have learned a few things in that time. People file for divorce for myriad reasons, but those who are able to approach the issues with an open mind and a willingness to negotiate are overwhelmingly more likely to consider their divorce successful.
A contested divorce tends to focus on who can be crowned the winner of a particular issue or the entire divorce settlement. This mind-set often promotes anger, contempt and hostility, but does very little to help effectively answer the question, “What do I really want my life to look like after the divorce is finalized?” My peacemaker services concentrate on finding family law solutions that will endure after my participation in your case has ended.
What Are Some Of The Benefits Of Cooperation?
Divorce mediation focuses on problem-solving, not competing with one another. It occurs in an informal and relaxed environment where each party is free to share his or her concerns; where listening to each other is encouraged so that realistic pathways to resolution can be discovered.
Other benefits of cooperation include:
- Saving money: The reality is that when you divorce, you will divide your marital estate in half. Working together can reduce legal costs and to help ensure that the portion of the community estate you walk away with is as big as possible.
- Saving time: The period between filing and finalization is very taxing emotionally and mentally. You can often reach a divorce settlement in much less time, allowing you to move on with your life sooner.
- Developing settlements both sides can live with: Divorce involves compromise. You can’t change that fact. Would you rather have control over the compromises you make or let a judge make them for you? ADR provides you with the opportunity to control the compromises you make, find creative solutions and talk about issues that could never occur in a formal court setting.
- Making the process easier on the children: Divorce is going to be a big adjustment for everyone, especially when children are involved. Working together gives children a sense of stability and fosters positive, healthy relationships into the future.
- Setting the foundation for co-parenting: When children are involved, you can walk away from being a spouse, but you cannot walk away from being a parent. California law favors joint custody, which means you will likely have to deal with your ex-spouse after the judge finalizes your divorce. Working together during the divorce can help you learn how to work together as co-parents after the divorce.
Unsure If ADR Is Right For You? Let’s Talk In A Free Initial Consultation.
There are some situations in which mediation or collaborative divorce may not be appropriate, particularly in extremely hostile relationships or those involving abuse. I conduct meet and greet consultations with prospective clients who are researching their options. You get the opportunity to meet me and learn more about each process without obligation.